Haii im Missy

fucking crying my eyes out i literally dont know what to do.

i cant leave her

im lost for an hour without her

cant move states.

thats asking to much ha

:/

bl00dfest tomorrow though;

get my mind off of things

a breath of fresh air

i really like my new boyfriend

alot.

hes sweet and i really do care about him

but nothing compares to how i felt for tommy

i hope those feeling will fade and the new ones can grow for jaron<3

hes really sweet and treats me right

im keeping him for as long as possible

:)

he hurt me more than i can even begin to explain.

i loved him and he broke my heart pretty much shattered it.

i had cared for him so much for so long

i would do anything for him. he knew that

he took advantage of that and yet i still miss the times we had together.

i miss the long walks at midnight

i miss raving together.

i miss the sleep overs

i miss waking up in his arms and him not letting go

i miss the adventures

i miss shopping with him

i miss us being basicly an old married couple fighting about the most stupid shit

i miss waking up together and getting ready together

i miss how he used to play with my hair when he was bored.

i miss how he used to kiss and hold me

i dont think anyone could do that like he did.

i miss when he was honest about things, which was rare for him

i miss how i was the only person to put up with his shit

i miss how my bestfriend liked him

fuck i could go on forever i dont know what to do about him anymore.

i dont want to be stupid and take him back

i cant

im torn and i have no idea what im going to do.

he wont even fucking talk to me

and when he does he makes me wanna shoot myself.

by telling me how much he missed me.

like ferreal.

shutttttuppp.

ugh im so stupid.

i have people who are on my side.

who love me

who show me they care

i have the best friend

anyone

could ever ask for.

she is the most amazing person i have ever meet and i wouldnt trade her for the world. she came at the best time in my life. when i was weak she is making me a stronger person and i could never truely thank her for it. she is a great person. she is beautiful inside and out she is smart and funny and i have the best times with her. nikki smallz your my bestfriend the most important person in my life. thank you for everything. really.

likes to confuse you. it plays tricks on your feelings. and i think its to test how strong you are. i was head over heels for tommy and everything was perfect then bam out of nowhere we stoped talking my world cam to a spinning chaos. i didnt know what i did. and guess what.. i didnt do anything this time. i suppose we just arent ment to be together. but oh my gosh does that hurt. more than anything. knowing that you could think that someone is your someone then you arent theres. its heartbreaking itsself on top of your already depressing situation. but the thing is im sixteen yearss old. i have plenty of time to find love. im going to go through loads of heartbreak and love before i find my true soulmate. i know they are out there somewhere its kinda like a trial and error game. me and tommy had a great relationship this time. but the heartbreak was overwhelming. i truely thought he was the best person ever. i was falling in love with him. i gave him more then than i ever thought i would after what happened last time. gah thing is i will always care about him. i will not ever be able to look at him and not want to kiss his lips again or tell him how much i truely care about him. but he needs to grow up. he needs to be able to realise that he missed out this time. im glad he tried at first though. it made me realise it was just drama that kept us apart at first. and drama that is keeping us apart again. i didnt kiss anyone at the rave i didnt do anything to make him upset however he thinks i did. i cant change his mind. i just hope he knows that i love him. and i always will.

being with my boyfriend. he makes me so incredibly happy. i love being in his arms. i love falling asleep with him. i love how i can never get anything done when hes around bahaha. ekk i am so happy. thank you nikki for helping me get him back.

Tommy, your everything i could ask for and more. You make me so incredibly happy, i doubt there is enough words to describe the feelings i have for you. We have a rough past but were getting through it. The butterflies you give me are remarkable. I adore everything about you. The eskimo kisses, the midnight walks, the way you grab my waist and tell me you love me. The things you make me feel. geeze boy, they are out of this world.:) Im trusting you tommy with my heart, we have built this friendship as friends i know we can make this work. we just need to try. i actually believe you this time tommy. dont make me feel stupid. I am not ready nor do i ever want any goodbyes from you babe. ily bby. :)

more than she and anyone will ever know. she means the world to me. she is the most important person to me. and im so glad i have her. she is the best.

Being together literally 24/7 has made our friendship stronger. we are basicly the same person but we have so many differences. Nikki, you know me better than i know myself. my absolute favorite memories and moments are spent with youu right by my sidee. i swear yr the best person i know. you know how to pick me up when im down and dont even think i can do anything. you motivate me and make me realise i have a purpose. you bring the better side of me out and you constantly amaze me.i love you more than anyone hahah. yew be my lil peeperzcreeperzz. <333(:

And She said that We could be
Anything as long as You’re my
Everything, that’s all I’ll ever
Need

I’m just a girl probably
Not Your type. I like to stay up
Late at night, to think of all the
Places I want to go, and try to
Live a fairytale who knows.

I
Hate to disappoint You, but I’m
Not the one made for You. maybe
I’m just one of a kind. is there
Any boy for me?
Does He have the
Heart to my key? if He took the
Time to see, there’s so much more
That we could be.

And She said
That We could be anything as long
As You’re my everything, that’s all
I’ll ever need.

You beat me
To the catch this time, try to
Find Your heart to give You mine,
But my legs did shiver as my lips
Did quiver and I couldn’t find the
Words I dropped the line. You have
All the eyes glued on You, every
Boy dying to be who, You say You
Love and call at night I never
Thought that I just might. I can
Take You and I’ll save You, up
Until the day that we’re through.
Oh, wait miss lovely, I’ll never be
Leaving You.

I can save
You.

Don’t say they’re words
Just for tonight, I’m only smiling
Cause they sound so cute and
Right. Please make it more than
Words.

I will save
You.

Don’t say they’re words
Just for tonight. I’m only smiling
Cause We seem so cute and right.
Please make us more than
Words.

Cause’ We could be
Anything just be My everything,
You’re all I’ll ever
Need.

And She said…

see splash tomorrow

like alot hahaha

and i wanna spend time with my bestfriend nikki

gr idk sir how im going to do it but im determined lol

lately.

i havent been able to get on this computer lolol

well.

im on now

and im in the mood to blog:]

mhmm<3